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Worry, stress and anxiety can eat up so much time, energy and confidence that it is worth knowing how to spot the build up, and the steps you can take to overcome it.  Sleepless nights, loss of appetite, reduction in sex drive, poor skin and muscle tone, non-specific aches and pains, general preoccupation and feeling tense as 'usual' are all signs that you need to pay attention to your stress and anxiety levels. So, what can you do to remedy this? 1. First, you need space. A little time to breathe, get clarity and prioritise. If you are working to a tight, very close deadline this may not be possible but in that case pick a day after the deadline has passed and set it as your breathing space, regardless of whatever else will be going on then. More and more people are working in an environment where there is always important stuff that needs doing yesterday, but did you ever notice that when someone is off, ill on holiday or just delayed, the world doesn't come to a standstill. Having a day off or a weekend away will improve your performance. Slaving on until you drop is less efficient, more of a problem for the employer, and of course, could kill you. 2. Breathe! Take at least ten long slow deep breaths, breathing in from the diaphragm, not the chest, and release the breath all the way out, expelling all the air. This reduces the buzz in your head, oxygenates your blood and calms the body. When we are aroused, either from love, lust, anger, frustration or worry we literally cannot think clearly. Trying to work things out for yourself in this hyper-aroused state is like trying to compete in a marathon with your pants wrapped around your ankles. 3. Write everything down. The spinning thoughts in your head will collide and crash around one into another until it feels like the world is ending. However, when I ask clients to write down specifically the first ten things they are worried about it, they never get past 5 or 6. (It wouldn't matter if they did, because we can work through each to resolution anyway, but the total number is always less than it feels in your head). 4. Prioritise. Which issue is the most pressing? Put that first. If there are two or more that you really can't pick between for first place, it means they are equally important and so picking one to go at first is the best option you have. Put the other in position 2,3, etc. *Important - if you get to this stage and find nothing stands out but everything is pressuring you, you may have developed Generalised Anxiety Disorder. Don't panic but contact your GP or a psychotherapist to talk t over and look at your options. It can definitely be resolved but not via an article such as this. 5. Breathing calmly - ask yourself 'what are all my options here?' Include ideas of just walking away, reducing the task to one key part, sharing responsibility with others, and don't dismiss any option. See how each one feels to you. At this stage you are just feeding your unconscious mind a menu of feelings. Ask your self - 'if a friend or colleague came to me in this situation, what would I advise them to do?' There is no reason you cannot take the same advice yourself. 6. Repeat the above stage with each of the issues you have written down. Don't rush to get them all done in one day. Let your mind work on them. Your unconscious will begin whittling awy at them as soon as they are on the page. 7. Go and do something else! You need to get space into your head, and turnng the problem over doesn't achieve that. Go for a run, have a glass of wine or a relaxing bath, listen to some favourite music or take a little time with your hobby. If you find yourself stuck for something, research into what other people do - rock climbing, cross-stitch, quizzing, art - you need a couple of these in your life so that it isn't just work and sleep. By the way sprawling in front of a screen with a series of beers isn't actually a hobby, its avoidance.  Having created your initial responses to your list, even if they not perfect, then gone away for a while and slept or lost yourself in some other activity, come bask and go through them again. I can guarantee you will be calmer, less overwhelmed and feel more in control, and that the tasks are more manageable.
You may still feel that you are over-worked (and under paid!) - and that is a longer term issue for you to deal with, but everything is doable. In your calmer state set your unconscious mins the task of coming up with ideas for medium- and long-term steps you could make to be in an environment more suitable, enjoyable and healthy.
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 Travel across the sands of time.  Were you the wise woman? What is Past Life Regression? Past Life Regression (PLR) is a popular method of allowing individuals to uncover memories of previous lives by means of returning, in their minds eye, to re-experience parts of those lives, usually facilitated by hypnosis, meditation or visualisation. I was excited to find it on the curriculum of my Hypnotherapy training course back in 2000 as it was something I was fascinated by, but often not included in discussions around psychotherapy. In PLR you may discover a life you have lived before. You may be a different sex, religion or race or live by values that you would find unusual or alien today. Its use in therapy stems largely from the work of Dr Brian Weiss, an American psychologist who, although trained in science -based clinical hypnotherapy (and other disciplines) discovered that sending a client back to the origin of their issues could resolve them. This idea was not new, but was usually limited to taking the client back to their own childhood. The incident with his patient Catherine, where she went back beyond the start of her current life to a previous existence, is described in detail in his book Many Lives, Many Masters which became a worldwide bestseller. I was fortunate enough to train with Dr Weiss in 2011. After the initial discovery, Dr Weiss did private research for a long period, not wanting to risk his professional reputation. Eventually he satisfied himself that the experiences people were having were real, at least to them, and were producing positive therapeutic change in their present lives. An earlier researcher into reincarnation was Dr. Ian Stevenson. Over his forty years of international research, he amassed three thousand cases of children who claimed to remember past lives. Although he was cautious about claiming this as proof, he presented it as a serious body of research that strongly suggested that possibility. A.R. Martin is credited with developing the early use of trance for past life regressions, publishing his research in 1942. It is difficult to evaluate the work though, as we have no record of how ‘suggestive’ Martin may have been in directing his subjects toward this desired outcome.  Were you there?  A druid bowl. Dr. Helen Wambach, working in the 1960s, was initially a sceptic. Using a statistical basis for her experiments she carried out multiple group regressions and compared the results. Her results did not match her expectations and she actually experienced some of her own past lives. I currently offer PLR group workshops which feature regressions based on her pioneering work. These days, although I do use regression in therapy, the majority of interest comes from open minded individuals who are curious as to who they may have been in a former life, and if anything from the past is informing their life today, positively or negatively, such as a particular talent or skill brought forward or a fear or phobia which doesn’t seem rooted in the present. So, how can you experience a Past Life Regression? Well, you have choices. First of all I should point out that a Past Life ‘Reading’ is not the same as a regression. Having a psychic tell you what they sense about your past may be interesting, but clients report that experiencing it in the first person under hypnosis as much more vivid. For an actual regression, the cheapest, but least reliable, is the online, pre-recorded option where you are guided to relax and then step into a previous life and are asked questions. Although some people do have success with this, the pace of the recording can be too fast or too slow, or you may just not ‘get it’ at all. And although the recording may ask questions, it can’t respond or follow up on your answers, and nor can it effectively respond if you find yourself in distress for any reason. This last point is something to be aware of even when having a regression in person. If you find yourself overwhelmed, upset, angry, or frightened, (known in hypnosis as an ‘abreaction’), can the person your are with handle it properly? As a professional psychotherapist I can work through any issue that may arise in regression and return you safely, with the issue resolved. This is much better than just bringing you out of trance and ending the session, which, sadly, is all too common. The best option is a one to one regression which consists of a pre-booking chat, a simple but effective visualisation test and a couple of relaxation recordings before the actual regression session. The PLR session is 1.5 - 2 hours, and is carried out in person, with the option to record the past-life element of the session on your phone. Most clients remember everything they experience while in trance, and even recall more details in the following days. A PLR group workshop can be a more affordable way to go, and is also fun to share with other attendees. I always put in a strong clear suggestion that the lives you will uncover in a group workshop are not traumatic ones, as that is not the place to do therapeutic work. I currently offer half day or full day sessions a couple of times a year in various locations. Contact me for details. If you have a group of six or more and can provide a suitable venue I can arrange a date just for you. Is it real? The ‘truth’ of the past lives we uncover cannot always be proved. Although there are numerous cases of a person recognising things about a place or an event that they could not reasonably have known, it is impossible to validate, given modern access to the internet. We may have learned something and forgotten it, seen it on tv or read it in a book. However, plenty of people do believe that these lives are real. We also find that the unconscious mind can use these sessions to bring up a life in which the client can explore elements which help then resolve an issue in their present lives. And there are explanations other than reincarnation for those that do believe, too. Akashic records, hereditary memory, Jung's ‘Collective Unconscious’ - it is an area of endless fascination. Paul Eagle. (Member of the Past Life Therapists Association) www.pastliferegessionsuffolk.co.uk  A Templar Shield  Trauma, whether experienced as a child, teenager or adult, can often affect you so strongly it distorts your life for years, impacting on your self confidence, your relationships, your physical health and your financial situation. It is easy to believe that the effects of trauma are now ‘just how I am’ but this is rarely true, and with caring and effective help you can process the experiences well enough to let the hurt go and generate new, healthier and happier ways of being. In mental health terms, trauma can be described in this way: Trauma is the lasting emotional response that often results from experiencing a distressing event that overwhelms a person's ability to cope. It can be caused by a single event or a series of events that are experienced as physically or emotionally harmful or threatening. Trauma can have lasting negative effects on a person's functioning and well-being. The Trauma Continuum: When working with trauma I consider the model of the ‘trauma continuum.’ This model recognises that multiple aspects must be taken into consideration to respond appropriately to trauma. These are: Severity: The continuum acknowledges that trauma exists on a spectrum of severity, ranging from mild, consciously processed experiences to severe, deeply impactful events. Intensity: The intensity of the trauma experience is a key factor in determining its impact and the individual's response. Social Support and Attachment: The level of social support and secure attachment an individual has can influence their ability to process and recover from trauma. Processing: The way individuals process trauma can vary, with some being able to consciously process milder experiences while more severe trauma may require the use of defence mechanisms. Impact: The impact of trauma can be both psychological and physical, and can affect various aspects of a person's life, including relationships, emotional regulation, and overall well-being. Treatment and Recovery: Recognising the trauma continuum allows for tailored interventions and support that address the specific needs of individuals at different points on the spectrum. Psychosis and Dissociation: Psychosis and dissociation can be understood as part of a continuum of trauma responses, where prolonged exposure to trauma overwhelms coping mechanisms. Intergenerational Trauma: The concept of a trauma continuum also extends to the impact of trauma experienced by previous generations, which can have lasting effects on individuals and communities. However, whatever the depth or strength of the elements listed above, the client will always feel their trauma as intense and personal, and the effects as singular to them. All too common types of trauma include childhood abuse (sexual, physical, emotional and neglect), teenage experiences with which the person was unable to cope; physical trauma such as a car crash, a physical fight or assault, a heart attack or injury and relationship abuse such as domestic violence, mental and emotional abuse and controlling behaviour. Post Traumatic Stress (from serving in a war, for example) and cPTS (complex PTS) where a person has experienced a series of traumatic experiences over a longer period, also fall under the heading of Trauma, and although challenging, can be helped with therapy. Sadly many people who have suffered trauma go on experiencing the pain and associated effects for years, compounding the problem. This is how we can get to the stage of believing a statement such as: “Since it happened I’ve been a different person...I used to be...happier, more positive, more capable, more able to cope, but now that just isn’t me” Fortunately, this type of situation is one where Hypnotherapy and its close relative Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) can be of great help. Hypnotherapy allows the therapist to guide the client into a receptive state of being. This may be relaxation, but doesn’t need to be. As long as the client is able to listen to the words spoken by the hypnotherapist it can have considerable effect. The hypnotist may use certain words, phrases, voice tones and physical gestures to communicate with the subconscious (or unconscious) mind as well as the conscious mind. This can lead to an understanding of the situation and eventually a guided resolution, with the hurtful emotions being processed safely, and unlocked from the mind of the client. Once the processing is complete, the old traumatic behaviours and beliefs fall away and can be replaced with more empowering actions, thoughts and values. There is sometimes a fear from the client that they can’t be hypnotised. Often this is down to a misunderstanding of what hypnosis actually feels like. This can stem from watching stage hypnosis where it appears the hypnotist ‘takes over’ the mind of the subject and they become a powerless puppet. In therapy this doesn’t happen, and in fact, there are many people who know it doesn’t happen on stage either, but that is another story. I never worry about a client not being ‘hypnotisable’ as there are other ways to get to the same end. Using NLP techniques we can sit, wide awake, open eyed and go through easy steps that let us safely allow elements of the issue to be exposed and dealt with, small pieces at first, then larger, until everything is released. The fact is, the client does the healing. The therapist is there to facilitate it - asking a certain question, staying quiet when the answer seems hard to find, guiding the client into a slightly new perspective in order that they can ‘try it on’ or ‘try it out’ – and then the client finds the way that they will heal the best, going into their internal world and discovering their own effective way. Some somatic activity can also be helpful, such as breathing or stretching exercises. Where there are other physical issues involved I always recommend getting checked over by a GP beforehand to discount a purely physical reason which may account for any symptoms. Although some counselling (in the form of CBT – Cognitive Behaviour Therapy) is available on the NHS, it is very over subscribed and in my opinion (based on discussions with clients, friends and colleagues) not always effective. I offer CBT in my practice and will use the appropriate parts in tandem with Hypnosis/NLP for the best outcome.  What can you expect in therapy? Well everyone is different but typically we will begin by exploring your story, what has happened, how it is affecting you, which elements are the most troubling and what you would like to be experiencing instead; working to release and process the issues you are carrying can sometimes be upsetting in the short term but like a bad tooth, some short term pain to get it removed is better than the long term pain as it gets worse; it is quite common when going through the process to feel a little destabilised as these elements of your trauma may have begun to feel like parts of your identity- when they are gone, who are you now? It usually doesn’t take long to begin to feel the relief as you rebuild your inner world in better shape, feeling freer, lighter, more in control and more capable overall.
If you are affected by the issues discussed here please remember that I offer a free initial consultation by means of a 15-20 minute phone call which will allow you to ask any questions you may have, to get an idea of how many sessions we may be looking at and for each of us to get a feeling about whether we are right to work together. There is no obligation to book at the end of the call. Please be aware there will be no therapy offered within the call time, just the opportunity to ask questions, explain your concerns and discuss a way forward. Please take a look at my website for further information. Thanks. www.pauleagle.co.uk Paul Eagle. Integrated Psychotherapy. Halesworth, Suffolk, UK and Online. The simple answer is Yes, of course (or this would be a very short article!) But there is a bit more to it than that. Take just a few minutes to read on and I’ll explain. And by the way, this is not AI – I’m an actual human being, so some of my expressions may be colloquial, and may not translate well into languages other than English. |
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